Thursday, June 16, 2011

Because Nobody Likes A Bruised Banana

Odessa: One time, I opened the door, and it was my friend Betsy in a banana suit.

Me: ...Are you even joking?

Odessa: I am completely serious. I didn't even know she was coming over so I opened the door and there she was. A banana. I just stood there...And she laughed so hard she couldn't even walk. I think she fell on the way to the car. It was the best thing to ever happen. And I lived in an apartment so I know my neighbors saw a banana walking to my door and then falling. They must think I have some sex fetish and banana people come to my house. I cried. And then we went to the movies and she changed out of the banana suit in the car.

Me: Imagine what the passersby must have been thinking. A banana peeling itself. And the banana just emerges from the car in jeans and a shirt and is like "LET'S GO!"

Odessa: I told her to keep the banana suit on at the theater but her dad said no. Party pooper.

Me: That's lamer than a bruised banana.

Odessa: DING, IDEA. Wear a banana suit and paint on a black eye. Bruised banana. And black out some teeth. Domestic violence banana.

Me: Oh my God.

4 comments:

  1. A few things. First, I'm totally doing this banana suit thing. Second, I totally read your whole "about" page, and you should know that I started blogging for the same reasons that you did. Third, you're effing hilar. HILAR! It's bro-speak. (Hilarious...I don't know why I do this to myself. I should have just written "hilarious" to begin with, but at this point I've expended a lot of energy typing this increasingly long sentence and I'm reluctant to press delete. As long as I'm writing this though...hi, how are you? Fine? Good. Okay bye.)

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  2. Megan...you are totally my new hero. Let's speak bro-speak forever. PS I got elated when one of my blog heroes said I'm hilarious and now my ego is huge.

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  3. Dude. The ego? IT NEVER GOES AWAY. Just kidding. But really. I'M GONNA GO UPDATE MY STATTY. AND MY PROFI PIC. IT'S GONNA BE RIDIC. AND SUCH. (Bro-speak. DUH.)

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  4. It's 4:27 am and I'm sitting in my dark quiet house laughing so hard I'm crying. The dog is concerned. I think the kids and I need to get matching banana suits and go to the local nature park and walk. As if nothing is out of the ordinary....

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