Saturday, November 6, 2010

Here Is My Crazy

This is kind of copypasta'd from a comment I just left on The Bloggess's post about her neuroses. But I feel like sometimes it's really good to let out some of your crazy so I'm going to do that, and I urge anyone to feel free to do it in the comments. Share with me. Let's be weirdo freaks together.

I have to check my purse anywhere from three to ten times before I leave my bedroom to make sure I have my keys, pills, wallet, my snacks "just in case", my makeup (that I don't even wear but it needs to be in there) and tape. Because you never know when you're going to need tape, right?

And before I leave my actual house I check again.

When I tie my shoes I check twice to make sure they're tight enough. Then before I leave I check to make sure I even tied them.

I check 100 times a day while I'm out to make sure I put on underwear, to make sure I have my phone, knife, and chapstick in my pockets. Sometimes I feel the need to check and make sure my glasses are on my face.

All of this stems from me losing ONE thing when I was a kid - when we moved to a new house when I was about six we left behind my Captain Underpants book. I like to think it's because I was too irresponsible to pack it. So now, I check to make sure I can never forget anything ever again, ever. I'm sure it drives Boyfriend crazy because I secretly make sure he doesn't forget anything anywhere, either. (The one time I didn't make sure he had all his stuff, he forgot his wallet and yo-yo at our friend's house. Seriously, the one time.)

I'm also terrified of ghosts raping my butthole in the middle of the night and that's why I have to sleep with a blanket at least covering my butt at all times. Even in summer. Something always has to be covering my butt. Or else I will be assraped by a ghost. I wish I was kidding.

Also I can't sleep with my bedroom door open unless someone is sleeping with me because a serial killer will find his way into my house, ninja himself upstairs, and come in my room and kill me while I'm sleeping.

I'm also afraid of the dark. Terrified of the dark. My future house/apartment/whatever will have many nightlights so that it's never too dark.

So, share with me. Please. Make me know I'm not alone.

2 comments:

  1. You're not alone. Except for the ghost butthole rape thing. You might be alone on that one. Doubtful, though.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ah, such is life. There needs to be an I'm-afraid-of-ghost-butthole-rape anonymous. Or...something.

    ReplyDelete